The Clueless Teen Titans
by Windrises
Summary: The Teen Titans think that they're related to one of their enemies and lose their powers.


Notes: Teen Titans was created by Bob Haney and Bruno Premiani and is owned by DC Comics and Warner Bros.

Robin had a meeting with the other members of the Teen Titans. Starfire said, "You look more intense than usual Robin. I'm suspecting bad news."

Robin replied, "We've had a big problem going on."

Cyborg asked, "What is it?"

Robin sighed and said, "I'm related to one of our enemies." The other Teen Titans were scared to hear that.

Raven asked, "How could you be related to one of the bad guys without knowing it?"

Robin said, "There's lots of obvious things that I don't know." The other heroes agreed with Robin about that.

Beast Boy asked, "Which villain are you related to?"

Robin said, "Brother Blood." The other heroes were really confused to hear that.

Raven felt sure that Robin wasn't related to Brother Blood so she asked, "What relation do you two have?"

Robin said, "He's my brother." Robin's teammates didn't think that Robin was right about that. Robin saw their skeptical expressions on their faces so he asked, "Why do you think that Brother Blood and I aren't brothers?"

Cyborg said, "Because he's like ninety years old."

Robin replied, "You're exaggerating. He's like fifty years old."

Cyborg said, "You're a teenager. How could you be his brother?"

Robin replied, "He always call himself Brother Blood when he's around me. I think that he kept saying that to let me know that I'm his brother. He kept trying to tell me, but I ignored him. It's time for me to treat my older brother with respect."

Starfire said, "But Brother Blood used that name around all of us."

Cyborg asked, "Does that mean that we're all related to him?"

Beast Boy said, "Yes."

Starfire said, "Well it's nice to know that we all share a relative."

Raven angrily replied, "You are all acting like clueless fools again. None of you have ever been related to each other or Brother Blood. Stop talking about such nonsense."

Robin said, "We should stop fighting Brother Blood. Perhaps we can get him to stop being evil. Lets go to his evil hideout."

The next evening Brother Blood was working on a plan to defeat the Teen Titans. He said, "I must think of something clever. Since the Titans are such fools I'll use my intelligence to defeat them."

Suddenly the Teen Titans burst into Brother Blood's hideout. Robin said, "We have a very important issue to talk about."

Brother Blood replied, "Okay. What's the issue about?"

Cyborg said, "We figured out that secret that you've been trying to tell us?"

Brother Blood asked, "What are you fools talking about?"

Raven sighed and said, "My four goofball teammates think that you're related to them, because of your name."

Brother Blood was surprised by how clueless the Titans were. He decided to lie to the Titans to trick them. He asked, "Are you superheroes going to beat up me?"

Cyborg said, "Since you're our brother we should go easy on you."

Brother Blood replied, "Thank you."

Starfire said, "It seems impossible for you to be related to all of us, because I'm from another planet and Beast Boy isn't a human."

Brother Blood decided to tell the Titans a fake explanation. He replied, "One of my superpowers is to make heroic people related to me. I picked you five and tried to tell you that we're related, but you always ignored me. Overtime my heart got broken multiple times. You immature fools barely count as superheroes."

Robin said, "He's totally right. We kept beating up our own brother."

Starfire replied, "It's disgraceful to be rivals with siblings."

Raven said, "You're making fools of yourselves."

Brother Blood replied, "This superhero team has had a long reputation of foolish antics. I want to fix that."

Robin said, "We'd be honored to get your help. What will you do?"

Brother Blood responded, "You five being a superhero team hasn't worked out. I want you to stop being a superhero team."

Cyborg nervously asked, "Are we going to get rid of the team?"

Robin sighed and said, "We can't be a superhero team anymore."

Brother Blood smiled while saying, "It seems like my younger brothers are finally starting to get mature."

Beast Boy asked, "Can we keep all of our cool gadgets?"

Brother Blood said, "If you don't use them on criminals."

Robin asked, "What else can we do?"

Brother Blood said, "That's enough stuff for now. Go back to your hideout. As long as you don't do any more crime fighting I'll forgive you."

Robin replied, "Okay. We aren't good enough to be crime fighters." Robin, Cyborg, Starfire, and Beast Boy gave Brother Blood a goodbye hug.

The Teen Titans went back to their hideout. Cyborg asked, "What kind of a team are we going to be now?"

Robin said, "I don't think that we should be a team."

Starfire asked, "Why?"

Robin said, "Our teamwork hasn't worked out. We beat up our brother several times. We'll ironically become more heroic people by quitting our superhero jobs."

Raven angrily replied, "It's hard working with four teammates who are so easily tricked. I need you to believe me about Brother Blood not being related to you."

Robin said, "We won't believe you unless you get evidence."

Raven replied, "Then I'll take his secret file and find out who he's related to." Raven snuck into Brother Blood's file room and took a paper about relatives.

A few minutes later Raven returned with the paper. She had Robin, Cyborg, Starfire, and Beast Boy look at the paper. Raven said, "You aren't on Brother Blood's relative list."

Robin replied, "I was totally wrong." Raven nodded in agreement.

Beast Boy asked, "Why does he call himself Brother Blood?"

Raven said, "He's not a family type of brother. It's just a title he made up."

Robin said, "Then we're not going to quit being the Teen Titans."

Cyborg replied, "Awesome."

Raven said, "Lets go get revenge on Brother Blood."

The Teen Titans burst into Brother Blood's hideout. Brother Blood asked, "What's going on?"

Raven said, "I proved to them that you're not related."

Brother Blood tried to use another lie. He said, "We're not related by blood which is why I'm called Brother Blood."

Starfire asked, "What do you mean?"

Brother Blood said, "My name represents the fact that even though I'm not related to you by blood I'm like a brother to you all."

Robin asked, "Do you actually care about us?"

Brother Blood said, "Of course I do. All of you are family members of mine."

Cyborg replied, "He seems sweeter than I thought he was."

Brother Blood said, "Lets be a family. None of us will be related by blood, but we'll make up for it by being a very good family."

Raven replied, "That won't happen." Raven zapped Brother Blood.

Brother Blood replied, "We're practically family."

Raven said, "You have as much nonsense as my teammates do." Raven used her powers to attack Brother Blood.

Brother Blood whispered, "Sadly the most powerful member of the team is the hardest to trick. I'll leave before I get injured." He ran to his helicopter and flew away.

Robin said, "It seems like he doesn't count as a real relative."

Starfire replied, "Sadly none of us are related."

Raven said, "Despite that we all care about each other like a family."

Cyborg replied, "Yeah."

Beast Boy said, "That's cool."

Robin asked, "Are you sure about us being like a family?"

Raven said, "It's clear that we are. Even though your goofiness drives me crazy you guys are the best family I've ever had." The Teen Titans hugged each other.

The next day, the Teen Titans finished up their latest battle with Mumbo. Raven, Cyborg, Starfire, and Beast Boy each had an important role in the battle, but Robin barely did anything.

While the Teen Titans headed back to their hideout Robin asked, "How come I didn't get to do anything cool?"

Raven said, "Although being a superhero without powers can be totally cool sometimes it can also be dangerous for other missions."

Robin angrily asked, "Are you calling me useless?"

Raven said, "Of course not. You don't have to be essential to every mission."

Robin replied, "But I'm the leader."

Cyborg said, "Well Fred was absent from Scooby-Doo for a few seasons so I guess leaders can take breaks."

Robin asked, "Aren't I the most useful member of the team?"

Beast Boy said, "You're the least useful bro."

Starfire replied, "That's not a polite statement. You're pretty useful Robin."

Raven, Cyborg, Starfire, and Beast Boy went to their rooms. Mumbo knocked on the door. Robin opened it and asked, "What's going on?"

Mumbo said, "Greetings Robin. My last battle with your teammates was a lot of fun, but you weren't giving me much of a challenge."

Robin sighed and said, "It seems like my lack of superpowers makes me less useful."

Mumbo replied, "But Batman is one of the Justice League's most useful superpowers."

Robin said, "I wish that I was more intimidating."

Mumbo responded, "I know how to take care of that."

Robin asked, "Huh?"

Mumbo said, "I have magical powers. I could take away the Teen Titans' superpowers. That way you would seem more important than ever."

Robin thought about it and replied, "My teammates might not be powerful enough to stop the bad guys without their superpowers."

Mumbo said, "Taking away their superpowers wouldn't hurt them. It would let them know how important superheroes that don't have superpowers are."

Robin replied, "Then your offer is great."

A few minutes later Raven, Cyborg, Starfire, and Beast Boy went into the living room. Mumbo used his magical powers to take away the Teen Titans' superpowers.

Since Raven was usually floating she fell to the ground and asked, "What's going on?"

Mumbo said, "I took your superpowers away." He ran away while doing an evil laugh.

Cyborg asked, "Why did you let the magician come in here Robin?"

Robin said, "To teach you that people that lack superpowers are important."

Starfire replied, "It was rude of you to do that."

Beast Boy said, "You betrayed us."

Robin replied, "Since I'm the leader I have to teach you important lessons. I'm a mentor, not a trader."

Raven asked, "Do you think we'll be able to stop any of our enemies without our superpowers?"

Robin said, "Since I've stopped hundreds of villains without superpowers I think that you can stop bad guys too. Since I'm your leader I have a moderate amount of trust in you."

The next day Mumbo was robbing a magic store. Robin walked up to his teammates and said, "I'm not going to join you on this mission."

Raven asked, "Why not?"

Robin said, "You four need to learn how to fight villains without superpowers."

Cyborg replied, "You're slacking off."

Robin said, "I'm being a high quality mentor."

Raven, Cyborg, Starfire, and Beast Boy went after Mumbo. Raven said, "We're going to stop you despite our lack of superpowers."

Mumbo responded, "You're even more pathetic than the Boy Blunder. You don't have any fighting skills. You only stopped me and the other villains, because of your powers."

Cyborg said, "I'm going to blast him."

Starfire replied, "But you don't have that power anymore."

Cyborg asked, "How could I lose the ability to blast stuff. My arm turned into a blaster."

Beast Boy said, "I'll turn into a scary animal to stop the magician."

Starfire replied, "But you don't have the ability for that anymore."

Beast Boy said, "I'm a weakling now."

Starfire replied, "I'll try to stop Mumbo with niceness." Starfire gently tapped on Mumbo's hat and said, "It would be very nice of you to stop being evil. You could inspire other villains to be good."

Mumbo replied, "Being a troublemaker is what I prefer. I'm going to cause trouble forever." He did an evil laugh.

Cyborg said, "I'll try to use my strength to stop him." He tried to punch and kick Mumbo, but Mumbo used his magical powers to beat up Cyborg.

Beast Boy said, "I'll use garbage to stop him." Beast Boy tried to throw a bag of garbage at Mumbo, but Mumbo used his powers to push the bag of garbage away and put Beast Boy in a garbage truck.

Raven grabbed Cyborg, Starfire, and Beast Boy and pulled them to a nearby bookstore. Starfire asked, "Why did you take us to the Bookworm's new book store?"

Raven said, "This time we have to use our intelligence."

Beast Boy replied, "I prefer being dumb."

Raven grabbed a book about magic and said, "We'll buy this so we can find a way to defeat Mumbo." Raven paid for the book and flipped around to find a page about superpowers. After a few minutes of searching she found the page. She used the spell which gave her and her teammates their superpowers back.

Several minutes later Raven, Cyborg, Starfire, and Beast Boy confronted Mumbo. Cyborg said, "We got our superpowers back."

Mumbo replied, "That makes you more threatening, but I think that my magical powers can stop you."

Raven said, "I found a page that informed me of how to get rid of your magical powers." Raven used the spell to make Mumbo powerless.

Mumbo angrily replied, "I'm so mad at you foolish goofballs. You got rid of my most useful quality. My magic powers were amazing. Getting rid of my eloquent powers was a disgraceful thing to do."

Cyborg said, "You can't do any more evil plans."

Mumbo replied, "Thankfully I do have a way of escaping." Mumbo used smoke screen to try to escape, but Beast Boy turned into a cat and caught up to Mumbo. Mumbo got put in Arkham Asylum.

After the mission was over Raven, Cyborg, Starfire, and Beast Boy went back to their hideout. Robin said, "You guys turned out to be pretty successful."

Starfire replied, "Raven managed to find the magical spell without superpowers."

Cyborg said, "It seems like you don't need superpowers if you're smart enough to think of ways to stop the villains."

Robin replied, "That's why I'm the leader. I'm one of the smartest superheroes of all time." Robin's teammates didn't agree with him, but they were polite enough to not argue.


End file.
